Tuesday, August 16, 2005
Emotions running high, not sure what to feel anymore...
Have you evered wondered to yourself how it feels to live inside a huge house? Let me share with you a story of a princess who lived her whole life inside that mansion.You see, everytime she is outside the mansion, people who often see her envies her. They are jealous and bitter and always wondering how it feels like to be living inside that mansion that hardly anyone has ever been at.She often hear people say, " oh you are so lucky to be born rich and popular!" or sometimes she hear people saying " I wish I can be in her shoes right now". such flatery should make her smile a bit and feel so damn blessed for being a princess... but sadly she feels the opposite... she isn't happy... she feels so alone and sad and afraid that the world might just eat her up had they known what its like to be inside that mansion.But of course those people would never know....Outside the mansion, the royal family gives an impression to the people how happy and glorious it is to be them. they appear to be so damn united, so together, so happy, so full of love. They act as if God has given them everything and couldnt ask for more... but sadly, how they appear outside is totally different on how they are inside that mansion.day in day out, bucket of tears fall down the princess face... but nobody knew about that. well except of course to the ones very close to her that she had the guts to share her feelings with....But what can she do? she didn't chose to be there. to be that princess, it was God's will and she lives to wonder why.... all the why's one could possibly ask, she'd asked them all... although never blaming God, she questions Him a lot....
Truth is, living in a mansion is not always heaven and paradise as many perceives it to be... it is most often the opposite... don't be fooled by the way people are outside... look them straight to the eye and you'll be surprise to find so many heartaches, so many fears, so many questions...but one things for sure... you'll see in those eyes just how hard she stayed strong when nothing is right and everything is wrong....someday i know that princess will find her happiness... i just hope she is as strong as i think she is to be able to get through this all....
8:44 AM
alone* in the rain;
Monday, August 08, 2005
have you ever felt so betrayed by the one you love yet don't feel bad about it?
today i realized something about me that i still don't want to admit nor accept... sabi nga im still in denial... i do know it's not healthy for me...
magulo, it's so damn complicated but what can i do? life sucks right now and i still don't know where i get the power to smile... where i get the strenght to wake up day in and day out...
it's so wrong....
and hirap pag wala ka mapagsabihan... ang hirap pag takot kang mapintsan o mapag-usapan ng hindi maganda...
if only life was a little bit less complicated...
i wish i were a child again... carefree...
7:45 AM
alone* in the rain;
Sunday, August 07, 2005
hello! jus testing....
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9:06 AM
alone* in the rain;